Comments on: Who You Are – Noreen http://realmental.org/archives/649 RealMental is a safe community where you can share and learn about mental health and everything that goes along with it. Sun, 29 May 2011 01:29:27 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Hummingbird http://realmental.org/archives/649#comment-7915 Hummingbird Tue, 09 Jun 2009 06:11:48 +0000 http://realmental.org/?p=649#comment-7915 I think I can relate to some of the things you say. I lost my sister to suicide a little over a year ago. We were very close as sisters. She never told me that she was thinking of suicide. We had talks over the years about suicide as our maternal grandmother chose that way out of this world. Also, our own mother had tried a few times, with no success. I am having such a hard time just getting to the point that I can act normal anymore. I miss her so much. I have been to psych docs in the past and am no on Luvox. I do not want to take it any longer. Seems like my libido is gone for good. And it doesn't seem to be doing me any good at all. I have no friends. Dont want any, really. I have not been to church in 8 years. I do not like the preacher there. Lots of hypocrites. They are always asking for money. My inlaws go there and they ask me to go but I have no desire to go. Empty nesting now as kids are off to college and making their way in the world. My dh works out of town and we no longer seem to get along at all even when we do see each other. If I try to talk to him about how I really feel, I am reprimanded. "Just get over it." Okayyyyyyy. Hmm, I really matter , don't I. I know I have some depression. Anxiety. It is rampant in my maternal side of the family. I want to be better. I really do. My past weighs me down. I feel unworthy. I do not want to be told that I am on a "pity pot" because pity is not what I want or need. I need my sister but I know she is not coming back. I can't afford to go talk to a therapist. And again, don't really want to. Would prefer to just talk to others via this web site that I ran across to night. It sounds legit. In reading this post, it struck me when you said,"I always fear that I cold become my mother in the bad ways". That is EXACTLY what my daughter told me that my sister said. Our mom was an alcoholic and abused prescription meds. It was horrible growing up in that home. We suffered because of it. Sorry for this long rambling rant. I just wanted to touch base with you and let you know that there are others out there in the world who feel your pain. We carry some of the same burdens. It sucks as you well know. Maybe tomorrow when the sun comes up, it will be a brighter day. At least it is 24 more hrs. past and we are still alive! I think I can relate to some of the things you say. I lost my sister to suicide a little over a year ago. We were very close as sisters. She never told me that she was thinking of suicide. We had talks over the years about suicide as our maternal grandmother chose that way out of this world. Also, our own mother had tried a few times, with no success. I am having such a hard time just getting to the point that I can act normal anymore. I miss her so much. I have been to psych docs in the past and am no on Luvox. I do not want to take it any longer. Seems like my libido is gone for good. And it doesn’t seem to be doing me any good at all. I have no friends. Dont want any, really. I have not been to church in 8 years. I do not like the preacher there. Lots of hypocrites. They are always asking for money. My inlaws go there and they ask me to go but I have no desire to go. Empty nesting now as kids are off to college and making their way in the world. My dh works out of town and we no longer seem to get along at all even when we do see each other. If I try to talk to him about how I really feel, I am reprimanded. “Just get over it.” Okayyyyyyy. Hmm, I really matter , don’t I. I know I have some depression. Anxiety. It is rampant in my maternal side of the family. I want to be better. I really do. My past weighs me down. I feel unworthy. I do not want to be told that I am on a “pity pot” because pity is not what I want or need. I need my sister but I know she is not coming back. I can’t afford to go talk to a therapist. And again, don’t really want to. Would prefer to just talk to others via this web site that I ran across to night. It sounds legit. In reading this post, it struck me when you said,”I always fear that I cold become my mother in the bad ways”. That is EXACTLY what my daughter told me that my sister said. Our mom was an alcoholic and abused prescription meds. It was horrible growing up in that home. We suffered because of it. Sorry for this long rambling rant. I just wanted to touch base with you and let you know that there are others out there in the world who feel your pain. We carry some of the same burdens. It sucks as you well know. Maybe tomorrow when the sun comes up, it will be a brighter day. At least it is 24 more hrs. past and we are still alive!

]]> By: noreen http://realmental.org/archives/649#comment-7902 noreen Sat, 23 May 2009 01:28:21 +0000 http://realmental.org/?p=649#comment-7902 thank you both for your comments. Moonflower, I am still out here :) i am happy you remember me. you have always been supportive and it means so much. I appreciate your wisdom more than you know. after your comment i had sort of an epiphany , (again!). i thought, if i am being honest i am already living a full life that my mother could not. and she wont be forgotten, because i wont forget her. my daughters love hearing about her so i know she will always live on. friend, take care xoxoxo and LoCoMotive, thank you as well for your comment. I do have good insurance, but better than that i think i know just the person to help me. a young therapist who has a personal interest in survivors of suicide. i put off getting help b/c i feel like i am "not that bad off" But obviously, it just keeps coming back to the surface. Even if things dont resolve, i need to talk every single day if thats what it takes to keep me from spiraling to some place dark that i am afraid of. maybe you can relate, but i always fear that i could become "my mother" in the bad ways. i need an outsider looking in to help me work through it. thanks for your response and concern. take care :) thank you both for your comments. Moonflower, I am still out here :) i am happy you remember me. you have always been supportive and it means so much. I appreciate your wisdom more than you know. after your comment i had sort of an epiphany , (again!). i thought, if i am being honest i am already living a full life that my mother could not. and she wont be forgotten, because i wont forget her. my daughters love hearing about her so i know she will always live on. friend, take care xoxoxo

and LoCoMotive, thank you as well for your comment. I do have good insurance, but better than that i think i know just the person to help me. a young therapist who has a personal interest in survivors of suicide. i put off getting help b/c i feel like i am “not that bad off” But obviously, it just keeps coming back to the surface. Even if things dont resolve, i need to talk every single day if thats what it takes to keep me from spiraling to some place dark that i am afraid of. maybe you can relate, but i always fear that i could become “my mother” in the bad ways. i need an outsider looking in to help me work through it. thanks for your response and concern. take care :)

]]> By: LoCoMotive http://realmental.org/archives/649#comment-7899 LoCoMotive Mon, 18 May 2009 00:12:38 +0000 http://realmental.org/?p=649#comment-7899 Noreen, I enjoyed hearing you speak of your home, birds and menopause. I hope you have insurance and I would recommend finding a psychologist that can help you through this. I wish you the best! Noreen,

I enjoyed hearing you speak of your home, birds and menopause. I hope you have insurance and I would recommend finding a psychologist that can help you through this.

I wish you the best!

]]> By: moonflower http://realmental.org/archives/649#comment-7898 moonflower Sun, 17 May 2009 02:58:42 +0000 http://realmental.org/?p=649#comment-7898 I'm proud of you for posting something. You can do it, you can be yourself. Be what she couldn't, be what you want. You can do it. xoxo I’m proud of you for posting something. You can do it, you can be yourself. Be what she couldn’t, be what you want. You can do it.

xoxo

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