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The Big Z
By marrit | August 18, 2007
Zyprexa gentled my psyche for four months after I had a mixed episode in April–a terrifying bout of mania and depression combined. I was resistant to it at first–anti-psychotic medication?–but finally I punched my ticket on the Z train and was ready to ride.
What was it like? Zyprexa is like pot that doesn’t get you high: quiets the mania immediately, makes you doddering and forgetful, and inspires a ravenous hunger. I’d been warned that I could expect to gain weight on Zyprexa (a small price to pay in exchange for not being, like, dead) and that I’d be hungry while I was eating, which was true. One user told me she used to bake a cake at night for her 3 a.m. munchies. After bedtime I’d start at one end of the kitchen and work my way to the other: Craisins, Lego fruit snacks, cereal, soy milk, SpongeBob Cheez-Its. All of it wonderful! So crunchy!
The ordinary disappointments of life glanced off my psychopharmacological armor. Professional rejection? Fuck it, let’s have cereal. Tough day at home? I’d curl up in a chair with a spoon of soy-nut butter. It was too easy, and it would have to end.
I stepped down to 2.5 mg for two weeks.
“Call me if you have any problems,” said my shrink. “Have me paged.”
I’m still waiting for the problems. So far it’s better than when I cold-turkeyed Serzone in 2000, better than when I was manic from too much Lexapro. I guess I’m pretty satisfied with how it’s all worked out–no, I have not lost weight–but one of the peculiarities of bipolar is that you’ll inevitably swing one way or the other sooner or later; the other shoe will eventually drop.
Topics: bipolar, marrit, meds |
August 21st, 2007 at 4:22 pm
have the opposite issue now. i’m never hungry. i can go all day and all night and the next day and then realize that i’ve only had a few glasses of water, a beer and a cracker. and still, the weight stays.
August 21st, 2007 at 11:17 pm
Alex has had a number of drugs that cause weight-gain, not the least of it being the mood-stabilizer Depakots (unaffectionately known among patients as “Depabloat”). He took Zyprexa for a while, and has also taken Abilify, Seroquel, and Risperdal (not at the same time). He definitely could not manage mania without one of the atypical antipsychotics, and I’m firmly with you in the “better plump than dead” camp.
August 21st, 2007 at 11:18 pm
That would be Depakote, not “Depakots.”